50

My birthday was last week. I don't really like to make a big deal about my birthday, but my friend, Stacey, was determined to make me have a good one because I turned fifty. Fifty. FIFTY!! Wow, could I really be that old? Stace did a great job. In spite of my complaining she managed to get several friends together for a happy hour after school on Friday. Several more mentioned to me later that they were sorry they couldn't make it. I may never know who all she invited. Because of her enthusiasm I invited Mama and Daddy to join us (they were in town for haircuts) and then the girls stopped by to see their grandparents, and John came (because he loves me, I guess). It was great - not a big deal, but big enough to make me feel really special. And everything was done by 6:00 so I could get home and chill.....perfect. Things couldn't have been better.

Or so I thought. Then at school yesterday another good friend, Suzy, who is an incredible jewelry artist brought me a bracelet she made for specially for me. The bracelet has fifty beads on it - one for every year I've been alive. She knows me and my eclectic ways pretty well. She's a kindred spirit. The bracelet is made of random beads of all shapes, sizes and colors in no particular order or pattern. It matches anything and everything.

The more I've looked at my special bracelet the more significance it has. I don't know if Suzy intended it to be this way, but my bracelet represents the years of my life in so many different ways. The sparkly beads represent the amazing, wonderful years like when I met John or when the kids were born. Some of the beads are similar shape but varying colors - those years that were kind of similar to each other with just small differences (like the years of high school or college or raising small children). One bead is black - to represent a particularly difficult year? (I know which one that would be.) Most of the larger beads are on one side of the bracelet, making it look sort of out of balance when I take it off, which is just the way life is...out of balance, but you don't notice that when it's happening, just when you look back. One is kind of flat with a scratch on the side. I remember a year that fits that bead all to well. I was kind of flat and out of sorts all year. I can't really pick a favorite bead (or a favorite year) because they all have something intriguing and special about them. They are all a bit different from the others in one way or another. They are all important to make the the bracelet fit me just right. All in all, it's one of the most important gifts I've ever gotten. It has forced me to look back on my life, to see the beauty that comes from the good and the bad, the way all the experiences of my life make me who I am just like all the different beads make my bracelet unique. And to realize that I'm special - even if I am a little quirky.

Thanks Suzy!